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Penguin & Elephant


by Anh, Heidi, and Alicia

concocted on Facebook on 12/03/2011



Dr. HorseNapper sends his army of 5 year-olds into the candy factory to steal all the candy. The leader of the 5 year-olds is MELVIN, a boy who loves football, candy, and being rotten. He’s so rotten sometimes he hides little girls’ left shoes just to be mean.



The town is left with no sweets, not even a grain of sugar, after their audacious raid of the candy factory. What are they going to do with all that candy? Well, eat it of course. There’s nothing horses and 5 year-olds like more than candy. Everyone knows that.


ELEPHANT, an engineer and a pachyderm (it means "thick skin" and is another word for elephant), tightens the springs on his new trampoline. He hopes this one will get him to Mars. It’s tough for an elephant to get into the air much less into space and, especially, to Mars. That would be quite an accomplishment for anyone. Elephants are not only very large animals, they’re also very smart. Smarter than an orangutan that’s for sure.

Penguin is bored of watching his friend Elephant tighten the springs all day. Penguin is bored easily. That’s because where Penguin comes from, the South Pole, there is ice everywhere so when any penguin gets bored it can fall on its belly and slide around for a mighty good time. Fun is just a belly-flop away. Penguin decides to go to town for some candy. Candy always does the trick for when there’s nothing to do but sit around watching your best elephant friend tightening springs.



The town is in an uproar. There’s not a sweet morsel to be eaten anywhere. All the good children cry. All the mothers and fathers are at a loss as to what to do.

There’s no stopping Dr. Horsenapper when he has all the candy. Horses are very fast and strong and when they’re smart and can talk and is a doctor like Dr. Horsenapper, well, there’s nothing to do but pack up your house and move to another town.

Penguin would like a piece of candy too. He’s not going to move again since he already came all the way from the South Pole. That’s a long way away, even if he did it on his belly on an ice slide. He’s going to save the candy he decides. It’s not fair that only a horse and his army of 5 year-olds get to have all the candy.



Here’s the problem. Penguins are naturally very slow. And they’re kind of small. People just aren’t scared of them. And 5 year-olds are even less scared of them than people who aren’t scared of them at all.

You can see that Penguin is walking into a sticky situation. Which is obvious as soon as Penguin gets to Dr. Horsenapper’s castle because out of the castle gates comes a mess of 5 year-olds.

Their leader is Melvin, the rottenest 5 year-old there ever was. Even when he was 4 years-old, Melvin was rotten and when he became 5 years-old he became one more year’s worth of rotten to add to his 4 years.

They chase Penguin all over town. It’s a wonder that Penguin’s little flipper feet doesn’t trip and they catch him. But, luckily, they stop to make fun of his little legs and he’s able to get away.



Penguin runs all the way to Elephant’s lab, where Elephant is still tightening springs on his super-trampoline. He asks Elephant for help.



Elephant, the candy has all been stolen by Dr. Horsenapper and his army of 5 year-olds.



Penguin, you know candy is very bad for your beak. You’ll get cavities.



That’s a good lecture for if I had teeth. But right now what I need from you is a way to get into Dr. Horsenapper’s castle.



I can send you on my new super-trampoline.



Those springs are tightened?



Not enough to get us to Mars but to get you across town, sure. But first you have to wear a helmet, to protect your head. And a scarf because it might get cold later.



Fine, fine. So long as it gets me into the castle.


Elephant gave Penguin a helmet which Penguin put on his head for protection. And before Elephant allowed Penguin on the trampoline he made sure Penguin wrapped his neck in a scarf. It’s always good to wear a scarf when leaving home because you never know when it’s going to get cold outside.

And with that, Elephant picked up Penguin and dropped him on the super-trampoline.

Penguin bounced off the taut surface and rocketed into the air.



Penguin’s little penguin heart soared with joy and with altitude. No penguin had ever gotten this high before. A squadron of geese squawked at him as they flew by. He could see the tiny, candyless town below him. In all the history of penguins had any penguin achieved as great a height as he had? I think not.


Then he crashed through the roof of Dr. Horsenapper’s castle. He landed right in the middle of the dining table. Seated at the head of the table was Dr. Horsenapper himself.

Surrounding him were Melvin and the army of 5 year-olds. Penguin knew immediately that he was in trouble. Melvin grabbed him by the back of his neck and plucked him off the dining table.



What should we do with him, Dr. Horsenapper?



Oh, I think we should do the usual with him, don’t you think, Melvin?


Melvin laughed a rotten laugh.



Sure thing, Dr. Horsenapper. That’s a swell idea.


Then they did the most horrible thing a horse and a bunch of rotten 5 year-olds could do to a penguin. They dressed him up in a clown suit. Penguin was so sad he almost cried.

They pushed him out the door of the castle and shut him out. He was forced to walk home through the middle of town in the clown suit.



Penguin was the most downtrodden penguin ever. Which was a stark contrast to where he was a little while ago when he was the most soaringest penguin ever. Sometimes life is like that, first you’re up then you’re down. Nothing to be done about it when it happens except be calm and carry on.



Elephant, look what happened to me.



You’re going to become a rodeo clown?



They dressed me up in this clown suit. For a penguin, there’s nothing worse in the world. Not even if all the ice turned to water would a penguin be sadder than I am now.



Well, the solution to this is easy, you know. You can always take off the clown suit.



I suppose you’re right.


So he took off the clown suit and immediately his spirit rose. Boy, Elephant sure knew how to solve things. This was one smart pachyderm. Maybe Elephant could help Penguin get the candy back from Dr. Horsenapper. It’s worth a shot, he thought.



Elephant, how do you think I can save all the candy?



Hmm, the best thing to do is to always think about a problem first.


Elephant stood still as a tree in a stone forest and thought. He was so still that Penguin thought maybe someone had shot him with a freeze-ray but he was really deep in thought and was standing still. Elephants do that when they think really deep thoughts. Finally, he stirred and Penguin knew, he just knew, that Elephant had come up with a good idea.



My old mammy-derm always used to say, “If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em” so that’s what we’ll do.


Elephant and Penguin dressed up in their old football uniforms and walked through town to Dr. Horsenapper’s castle.



When they got to Dr. Horsenapper’s castle they were surrounded by the army of rotten 5 year-olds.



We’re here to play football.



I’m the best at football. No one can beat me.



I think we should have a football contest. Do you have a ball?


They didn’t.



I have an idea. You wait here.


He ran inside and came back out with the jar of candy.


Then they played football. Elephant and Penguin were on one team and the rotten 5 year-olds were on the other team. They ran up and down, backwards and forwards, and zigged and zagged. They ran through the entire town, scattering the candy in the jar all over the streets. The townspeople rejoiced at getting their candy back.


By the time the game was over all the candy was gone.


Dr. Horsenapper was so angry he could have kicked a wall. But there was nothing he could do. The candy was gone. Penguin and Elephant had outsmarted him.



Penguin and Elephant sat in tubs filled with warm water and soap to wash their feet and to relax their tired muscles. They had had a strenuous day of playing football.



Elephant, thank you for your help. You really saved the candy on this one.



Oh, it’s nothing, Penguin. Sometimes we have to help friends. Especially when there’s candy involved. It’s better to share. That way no one ends up having to wear a clown suit.



Amen to that, brother.




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